Sometimes the Rich Tapestry of Life is just a bit too rich for me. Like a meal of a creamy bisque, a pork belly roast, and a crème brulee`, it sort of sits in the stomach and weighs you down. Let's face it, sometimes we all wish the Rich Tapestry of Life would nick off and enrich someone elses life, right?
It's times like these, that I guess many folk suffer with depression and anxiety. Heck, I know I've felt depressed and anxious on many occasions in recent years. But I'd fall short of describing myself as Depressed or Anxious in a clinical sense. If I thought that were an issue, I wouldn't hesitate to visit my friendly GP for some advice.
We're just talking regular run-of-the-mill stuff, where life just throws you a few curve balls in a row. And dang those curve balls smart if they hit you! I've had a few of those nasties leave a welt on my psyche lately!
But here's what I like to do.
I go for long walks in the sunshine.
I eat well, and include fruit, veges, fibre and lots of water in my diet.
I keep hands and mind busy and occupied, usually by baking or sewing or embroidering or indulging in any one of a number of crafts.
I switch the TV off and avoid social media.
I plant flowers in my garden or in pots.
I pick lavender from my garden and put it in vases and on my pillow.
I use lots of positive self-talk, and remove myself from the company of negative or critical people.
I give myself a manicure.
I pat my dog.
I visit my son who has the disability of Cerebral Palsy and who is always upbeat and cheerful, not matter what.
I ring my sister.
I have coffee with a friend.
I look at old photos and remind myself that life is good.
I revisit an old favourite embroidery book and pick up my fanciwork.
I prepare for Christmas and other celebrations and remind myself that there is much to look forward to.
And I definitely tell the Rich Tapestry of Life to nick off and enrich someone elses life. Actually what I say is a lot more colourful, and not usually part of a ladies vocabulary.
But it does get rid of some of that angst!
What are your strategies for coping with too much of the Rich Tapestry of Life?
I might be able to use some of them!
Mimi when my thoughts turn to 'Poor bugger me', I sit down and write in my journal. I write all my thoughts, including some that have been rather nasty. I then look closely at what is causing the feelings and critique my journal writing, like I would critique an essay. I just find this helps me to identify the what and the why. It is also the only task I can do where I am still.
ReplyDeleteDigging in the garden, planting, pruning and picking is one of my stress relievers. Riding to the beach on my trike with the little dog in the back is another. Movement is the only way I can cope when under duress. When Bluey was so sick last year I walked for miles and did a lot of trike riding as well.
To craft I have to feel content. Crafting require sitting down and immersing yourself in a task. In times of stress this is beyond me.
Dear Jane, I have tried journaling, and haven't found it incredibly helpful, although I know many people do. I find I can achieve possibly the same result with self-talk. Asking myself 'what is the root cause here', and reminding self that I cannot change events, I can only change the way I react to them, is liberating. It's a good thing to find whatever it is that works for you anyway, I think. It just goes to show, we are all different, and there is no one size fits all approach. I'm hoping Blueys health issues are behind you now. Mimi xxx
DeleteDear Mimi, I love the photo of your son , what a lovely bright smile !That would cheer anyone up :-)
ReplyDeleteI usually get busy in the kitchen or do jobs Ive put off and set the timer to challenge myself.When the kids were still at home I use to make yoghurt in the Easi Yo maker, put the breadmaker on, and bake something nice.
Or ring a friend for a chat , or write a letter ( before internet was popular),clean my car, or rearrange rooms.Or read pages from one of my inspirational books , That's all I can think of now.
Love Maria xxx
Dear Maria, yes he is a handsome fella, my boy. Keeping busy is always a good strategy I think. I remember when Mr A was still at home, and doing what you did...Breadmaker, Easiyo, Oven going...and Husband would come home and say 'what's happened'...lol! I love your ideas. Anything to get rid of the bad thoughts is constructive I think. Mimi xxx
DeleteI try to remember to pray about the situation first but that doesn't always happen if I am really upset. Meeting friends always helps but most of my friends are still working and not retired like me or live out of town. Getting out if the house and into the garden helps me to calm down and think about the situation and work out if there is anything I can do to improve things. Mimi, your son must be wonderful.
ReplyDeleteDear Chel, prayer is always good. Anything that refreshes the mind can help I agree with you there. My son is my hero, honestly. Mimi xxx
DeleteI love your honesty and outlook on life. Praying and reading my Bible always help, even if I sometimes rebel against doing it right away (thinking I can resolve things in my own) in the wand it always helps!
ReplyDeleteDear Melissa. Isn't that the truth. Sometimes we think we can solve things alone, and what we really need is to trust our Higher Power. Love, Mimi xxx
DeleteHi Mimi. I agree with Maria about your son's smile! My son has severe learning difficulties. He is a young adult, still living at home, and is quick to realise when I am down, giving me a cuddle or sharing a giggle. Such a tonic! When life is a little too much I find that nature is an excellent escape, whether it is simply picking flowers from the garden to brighten up the house or going for a long walk. I am also a demon cleaner when I am trying to hold worrying thoughts at bay. Cupboards beware... Finally, we have a super radio station here in the UK, Classic FM, and the wonderful music never ceases to calm me and bring a little beauty into the darkest days. Tracy xx
ReplyDeleteDear Tracy, our special children truly are special aren't they. As much as we have life challenges, they always seem to show us that there is more to life than worry. I must see if we have a local Classic FM radio station. That sounds lovely. Mimi xxx
DeleteDear Mimi,
ReplyDeleteWhen life has thrown me curve balls, and there were quite a few in the last year, I like to pray as well as read my bible. I make gratitude lists, knowing that I have plenty to be grateful for and that whatever is going on, this too shall pass. For me, worry doesn't change anything and I put it into the category of paying interest on a loan I never took out. That's not to say that I don't have concerns most of which I can be proactive about. This sounds crazy but weeding my garden is very therapeutic. As I pull the weeds out of the soil it has the effect of pulling the weeds out of my life. Doing something and nice for someone else always pulls me out of the doldrums. Blessings, Cookie
Dear Cookie, I am sorry to hear that you've had your share of curve balls too. I know that it's all part of life, but sometimes, it seems it all happens at the same time, and it's a bit hard to digest. You are so right in saying worry changes nothing. I try to live by that, but it doesn't always work. Prayer is good too. I love your analogy about the weeds. So true. Love, Mimi xxx
DeleteOh gosh. Looking over several times in recent years, I realize that I haven't changed much in my whole life. I lived two lives as a youngster. Living with my g'parents, life was entirely organized and predictable. The day to day was set, there were no self-created emergencies, & life was always predictable and pleasant. Living with my parents, it was exactly the opposite. Chaos. From a young age, my coping mechanism became control. I had to control something or at least feel I was doing it. As a kid with my parents, I'd clean my room in such a way that my books were in alphabetical order and my clothes by color. While outside my room was a mess, the inside was as pleasant as I could make it. As a young adult, heart ache would be met with a major cleaning project.
ReplyDeleteCould be scrubbing the tile in the swimming pool in summer. Or scrubbing the shower tile with a toothbrush- I'll have to look into the tile thing lol. Scrub the man right out of my life lol?! Now, as a 50 something, I'm the same. I will clean and organize something. A closet, a dresser, a bookshelf, etc. I would love to be able to sit and lose myself in a craft project, but I lose all creativity in stress. I see black. Some years ago, a major stress had me ironing for more than 24 hours straight!! I had just joined a quilting group and we were donated bags of fabric. It was dusty and wrinkly. I had volunteered to take it and wash/iron it a bit at a time. Major stress event & I finished it all in a day lol!!! Then, I went to the dollar store, bought storage containers, separated it all by color, & labeled it! Chaos into control....my coping mechanism.
Dear Debby, now isn't this an interesting insight. Control the things you can. That's a favourite strategy of mine too. I'm not sure I could clean tiles or iron for 24 hours, but I'm with you on the thinking behind it. Chaos into control. A good one. Mimi xxx
DeleteHi Debby and Mimi,
DeleteYour ideas on order & control brought back memories of working through 'The Artist's Way' and being struck by her way of seeing God in G ood O rderly D irection. It resonates with me in a major way, too. As the saying goes: To feel better, finish something.
I just wish I could get a work-attack and do the 24-hr thing!!
Thank you for this timely exchange :)
Hanne
My coping strategies include imagining what I would like to be happening rather than what is actually happening - visualisation is one of those airy fairy things but I'm surprised how many times it works. I also like to look at the situation objectively and ask myself what I can or could have done to achieve a better result. When there's nothing wrong, other than my attitude, I like to read your blog because you have wrapped up commonsense and a positive attitude with a satin, sequins, decals, lace, buttons and bows. You make me feel good.
ReplyDeleteJaniebabe
Dear Janiebabe, as always you bring a smile to my face. Thankyou so very much. Mimi xxx
DeleteHi Mimi, your lovely photos and excellent suggestions certainly cheered me up just now! Doesn't it seem like those curve balls can really blind-side you once in a while? I always get a little sad this time of year due to the changing seasons. I look forward to it, but the shorter days and longer nights take some adjustments. I especially love your suggestions for working in the gardens and shutting down the tv and computer. I have 4 married children and assorted relatives and there is always 'drama'. I need to stay 'serene' now that I am the family 'matriarch'! Sometimes it is very hard. One of my favorite remedies is to get a good night's sleep. Everything always looks better in the morning! Thank you for the lovely and uplifting post. xx Karen
ReplyDeleteDear Karen, I think the change of the seasons is something we do our best to celebrate with our own little rituals. I daresay you feel it more where you are than we do here in the Sub-Tropics. As for family 'drama'...well...is there any family who doesn't have it? Sigh. A good nights sleep is an excellent suggestion. Mimi xxx
DeleteWhen life is closing in on me, I go to my favorite room and spend time with the Lord. I praise Him, thank Him and talk to Him about anything and everything. Just being in His Presence always makes me feel better and always gives me hope. When I leave that room, I'm always better off than when I went into it. It's always time well spent.
ReplyDeleteAll things are better with prayer and solitude. Thankyou for that lovely advice. Mimi xxx
DeleteI always find inspiration when I visit you. I think I'm going to try to spend some time outside today.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Laura of Harvest Lane Cottage
Thankyou dear Laura. I trust you are recovering from your treatment. Love, Mimi xxx
Delete