Motherly Advice....Be your dream self...

 

Life is short.

 

I'd like to add...so have fun with it.

 

We all here, you, me, us, try to live a frugal life, not just for the sake of living frugal, but also to allow us to splurge and have the 'good things in life' sometimes too. It's not all just endless frugality with no reward. No, no, no. What would be the point of that?

It's all a pathway to being able to live a certain kind of life, right?

If fact, many people find themselves living a certain kind of life, to enable them to talk about it.

 

Why?

 

Well, I think it's for many reasons. For admiration, for a sense of belonging, to be part of a greater cause, to be held in high esteem by others, to impart knowledge...these are just a few reasons.

 

But there's a more esoteric way of looking at this idea.

 

It's called Maslows Hierarchy of Needs.

 

Here's the pyramid of needs as devised by American psychologist, Abraham Maslow.

 

He was a clever man who also said "The ability to be present in the moment is a major component of mental wellness", "I suppose it is tempting, if the only tool you have is a hammer, to treat everything as if it were a nail", and "What we can be, we must be, in order to be at peace with our life".

 

I like him.

 

 

His theory is, that we all start at the bottom of the pyramid. We all need food, water and sleep to survive.

 

But once those needs are met, we move up the pyramid to needing a place to call home, where we feel safe.

 

Being loved and having a sense of belonging is our craving once we have Physiological and Safety needs covered, and I need to add, that this is not a chronological process. Many of us live through each of these stages, not once but many, many times throughout our life.

 

Relationship, health, and financial issues impact on each of these needs, sometimes several times in a lifetime, and interestingly, it's difficult, if not almost impossible, to meet a higher need, if our most basic ones are not being met, no matter our stage of life.

 

At some point we all aspire to Esteem. The esteem of others, and hopefully a healthy self-esteem. If your needs in the lower three areas of the pyramid are being met, then you should be well on the way to having this need met too.

 

And finally Self-Actualization where expressing one's creativity, quest for spiritual enlightenment, pursuit of knowledge, and the desire to give to and/or positively transform society becomes the force that drives us.

 

Those highest two, are, I think, what motivates people to share so much of their lives on social media these days. It's not really about 'look at me', it's more about 'look how high up the Pyramid of Needs I am'...even if they don't know about the Pyramid of Needs.

 

Here's an example of that idea in action.



I just watched the film, Florence Foster Jenkins. Have you seen it?

 

It's the true story of a wealthy socialite who sang opera. I'm not spoiling it for you by mentioning that she was a terrible singer, because the whole movie revolves around that fact. But it didn't stop her from singing. Not one whit. In fact she made a gosh darned good show of singing her little heart out.

 

Now there's someone at the peak of their Self-Actualising.

 

Her basic needs were met, so she was able to meet her higher ones. She was loved by many, she helped many, she lived her dream, no matter what anyone said.

 

Go Florence, I say.

 

 

One of the final lines in the movie is actually the opposite of a mantra I've often used. My mantra is 'just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should' and in my own context, it refers mainly to the injustices of the world.

 

Florence Foster Jenkins is a shining example of a kind of reverse idea that says...'don't let the fact that you're not brilliant at something, stop you from enjoying it anyway'.

 

I love that too, don't you?

So what has that to do with the Chinoiserie Chic bedroom at the top of my post, you ask?

 

Well here it is.

 

I've been working on a bedroom makeover. If you saw my last post, you'd be aware of that.

 

I'm no interior designer, but I do have a creative eye. Hence 'don't let the fact that you're not brilliant at something, stop you from enjoying it anyway'.

 

Secondly, life is dreadfully short. The older one becomes, the more patently aware you are of that fact.

 

Having entertained a pastel French Shabby Chic home décor for well over 30 years now, my mind turned towards something brighter, bolder, and more glamorous.

 

Because having exited my child bearing and child rearing years, I too, am becoming bolder, brighter, and I hope...more glamorous.

 

The outer should reflect the inner...yes?

 

And here's the thing in relation to that Hierarchy of needs.

 

For many years now, my first three tiers of needs have been met, so now, as I approach my 59th birthday, I'm working towards my final two tiers of needs.

 

The last two years have seen a makeover of self, and a re-establishing of who I am, post child rearing.

 

Now comes the makeover of home and hearth to match.

 

That's why this pastel arrangement...

 

….now boasts bold colours,

 

 

...and metallic trims....

 

 

….and these thrifted pretties...

 

 

...are being made over with bright pops of colour and accents of gold.

 

A blogging friend urged me this week not to change. She was finding my recent obsession with all things Chinoiserie, at odds with who she thought I was. Kind of sweet of her in a way.

 

But Life is Short.

 

Have Fun While You Still Can.

 

And... Just Because You're Not The Best At Something, Doesn't Mean You Can't Enjoy It Anyway.

 

Those are my new mantras.

 

I'm determined to be Bold, Bright and Glamorous for my remaining years.

 

I want my home to be a reflection of that.

 

Hopefully my blogging friend will love me all the same.