Mimi's Savings Secrets....Be true to self...

This is part of our lavish tropical garden. All planted by hand with tiny baby plants, twelve years ago.

 

Today I just want to share with you how that garden came about.

 

 I learned early in life, to face my fears.

 

Fear of ridicule, fear of being left out, fear of failure, fear of what others may think, fear of not fitting in, fear of being different, fear of being thought less than what we are, fear of being laughed at, fear of having our way of life diminished in the eyes of others, fear of not being included, fear of poverty (because we overspend), fear of wealth (because we feel guilty at having so much when others have little), fear of doing or saying or living somewhere that is unacceptable in the eyes of others. All those things put the brakes on us living the life WE want.

 

My daughter recently completed a Dance assignment for school and the topic was Martha Graham the dancer who pioneered what we now call Contemporary Dance. The Bangarra Dance Theatre Company perform this style impeccably. She is famously quoted as saying...

"What people think of you, is none of your business..."

 

Well, being that the majority of our fears are based upon what others might think, perhaps Martha is worth listening to.

 

Since I stopped worrying about what others think about 2 decades ago, my life has leaped ahead in ways I could not have imagined.

 

When my husband and I bought our current house on an acre, it was a shambles. It had been used by bikies as a drug manufacturing location, and was in a terrible state. There was no garden, and no fence whatsoever. Our daughter was 2 and our youngest son, (who has Cerebral Palsy) was 11. The house itself was 3 tiny bedrooms, a lime and chocolate laminated kitchen and a horrible bathroom (where the drugs were manufactured!) and was not in any way, wheelchair accessible. It had been up for sale several times and was going for a song. We bought it. Everyone thought we were mad. But we could see what it could be.

 

That was 12 1/2 years ago.

 

Husband and friends he knew through his business, did all the renovations. We added a garage, so that our wheelchair bound son, had access from the garage and a suitable disabled toilet and shower. We renovated the existing part of the house to make it liveable, and Husband built me a kitchen, making the doors out of tongue and groove pine and limewashing them. We polished the wooden floors ourselves one wet weekend, and it's pretty rough to this day. But we kind of like it like that.

 

We planted things, me starting holes off with a crowbar in the packed earth, and Husband coming along behind me digging by hand. We would spend entire long weekends and every weekend in between, planting baby trees and shrubs and bromeliads bought at the local markets for a dollar or two each, or given to us by my Mum who was still alive then. We built fences, digging post holes ourselves. We built boulder retaining walls, carting the boulders in one at a time in a wheelbarrow, from the footpath where they'd been delivered. We did the same with concrete to pour paths.

We laid tiles, we painted, we argued with tradesman who couldn't see our vision, about how we wanted things to be. The guy that built our bed thought I was mad. He couldn't imagine why we just didn't buy a bed. Our bed is just a king sized particle board platform, with two steps leading up to it. The carpet that covers the room just continues up and over the steps and the platform and our mattress sits on top. I still feel like a queen when I get into bed, 12 years later. Clearly, I won that argument.

 

It was six years before we could sit back and declare an end to renovating and upgrading. It was worth it.

 

Our house is not a showpiece in the way that others homes are. But it is 'us' in every possible way. For less than the price of a 3 bedroom low set brick house on a normal block, we have the house of our dreams. Note I say 'of OUR dreams'. Not the 'dream home' marketed to us by the builders.

If we had listened to anyone at the beginning, we wouldn't be where we are today.

Ditto with our disabled son living independently, and our daughter changing dance schools from her high profile one, to one that teaches from a church hall, buying a dog that wasn't trendy, and keeping our cars for what many think is an indecent amount of time.

 

Be true to yourself. Decide what sort of life YOU want, and as Martha says 'What the world thinks of you (for doing so), is none of your business'.

 

Be clever, creative and inspired today. Your dreams may just be little seedlings now, but look what a beautiful garden of dreams you could have in just a few short years.

 



...Mimi...

Mimi's Savings Secrets....Set priorities...

 

The bridge in Monet's garden at Giverny. My own photo, taken in 2008, when I fulfilled a lifelong dream of visiting the picturesque little village where he lived.

 

We try to have a big overseas trip every two or three years. We prefer to travel comfortably and stay in nice hotels or houses. Not for us the cheap airfares, economy hotels, and bus tours with 50 other people.

 

Suffice to say, that we don't go cheap.

 

We don't consider ourselves part of the 'moneyed set', though, and these trips mean sacrifices in other areas.

 

We are off on such a trip this year, so I thought I'd use this year on my blog, to document how we can afford to fly comfy class, stay in a five star hotel in London, cruise the Mediterranean in luxury, have a relaxing stopover in Singapore on the way home, and arrive back refreshed and with not a whit of guilt, and without battering the credit card.

 

I find it highly amusing that friends and family in much less stable financial situations than our own, find it embarrassing to talk about saving money. Gosh kids. If we hadn't saved, we wouldn't be where we are today. Where's the shame in trimming a little here, to allow greater expenditure there, where you really want it?

 

They insist on upgrading their car every second year, buying their kids designer clothes (seriously? What baby of two or even ten year old cares whether their rompers are Ralph Lauren or Target??), eating out regularly and entertaining lavishly.

 

And NOBODY is game to be the one that says 'but what if we just entertain at home or make our own sushi or buy the kids clothes from the clearance rack at Target for next year' (when everything is marked down to three bucks and is the same stuff that was $30 a couple of days ago). Nobody needs to know but you, so where's the shame in it? When did the idea of home made, marked down, heavily discounted for today, or even *gasp* thrifted (the celebs call it vintage dahhlings...) or handed down from a friend, become icky, and why?

 

And really, no matter how much we earn, it's still a FINITE amount kiddos. Everyone's income is limited. Even if you're earning gazillions, it comes to an end sometime. If you keep spending, all you'll have in five years is a lot of stuff, and an empty bank account. Why do you think all these ageing rock stars suddenly pop up doing a revival tour when they're all old enough to be my grandfather? It's cause they too have a bank manager breathing down their turkey like, scrawny necks. It's just undignified, I tell you. Some interesting reading on this topic here.

 

My husband and I decided long ago that we'd rather drive our cars for ten years before upgrading, that we'd prefer to DIY our garden and home even if it took longer and meant living amongst sawdust indoors while we sawed and painted our way to perfection, and dust outdoors while our garden, lovingly landscaped over six long years, took hold. It was a sacrifice we were prepared to make to then be able to afford those trips and have a few other little luxuries. And when I say 'luxuries', I mean a plan for our future, for our kids future and even a bit for the grandkids for their future.

 

I've had my own children tell me that our ideas are old fashioned. Well that may be so. But all I see is that things don't change that much. You can't live like a rock star or royalty at 30 and expect to be able to continue doing so when you're 60. I know because we're nearly there, and even we have made our mistakes. We could have invested differently, hung on a bit longer there, declared defeat there, and been better off, sure. But overall, we're okay. And not through upgrading our cars, technology, shoes and bags every five minutes. Rather through sacrifice and prioritising.

 

Now I can't tell you how to trim your budget to be able to afford your luxuries, but I can tell you how we did it, and how we continue to do it even now as we edge very close to retirement.

 

Lesson no. 1 coming tomorrow...

 

...Mimi...